


Let's Never Speak of This Again

by Phonenixette



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Drug Use, Gen, IPRE shenanigans, Multi, crazy party, things getting out of hand
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-21
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2019-01-21 02:53:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12448176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phonenixette/pseuds/Phonenixette
Summary: The IPRE crew land on a new plane and find it's very very down to party, and they are not as prepared as they believe. Shenanigans and light shipping (at least for now) not sure when/if I'll write more.(First time I've ever really written fanfiction or like anything in a long long time so go easy on me :P)





	1. Let's get a lay of the land

There are some cycle the crew just doesn’t talk about that often, ones where things went boringly smoothly or where the world was too dead to land on and nothing terribly interesting happened. There is only one cycle that caused half of them to specifically agree to never speak of again.  
This world was thriving. No doubt it was one of the planes most bustling with life they had encountered in the nearly 30 or so cycles they had traveled, and not just life, people. The surface of the world was crowded with huge cities. Cities that were far more complicated and advanced than most planes, shining with metal coated twisting towers and lit in bright neon colour at night like an unnatural aurora. Both the people and the lights made the crew worried about finding the Light of Creation this cycle, both could complicate matters. However the worry was unwarranted. By sheer dumb luck the Light landed in the one gigantic park and nature reserve they had spotted on this hemisphere and had decided to hide the Starblaster in, and now all the crew had to do was collect it and bring it back to the ship.  
“Alright, we know the Light landed a few miles North-East of here” said Davenport as he landed the ship with a gentle thud. “We need two search parties to head that direction spaced out a bit away from eachother to cover more ground.”  
“I think I need to stay on the ship for a bit” Barry quietly interjected, “There are some, strange readings between the planes in this system that I think-“  
“NEEEERRD ALERT!” yelled both twins in unison, high fiving without a glance at one another. Garnering a stifled chuckle from Magnus and a deep red blush from Barry.  
Davenport sighed “Lup Taako you take the more Eastern path and leave Barry to work. Magnus take the Northern path, and bring Merle in case you find something to fight”  
“Will do Capn’port” cheered Magnus  
“Take Merle or fight something” Taako asked with raised eyebrows.  
“Both!” Magnus laughs.  
“Alright then” Davenport said “is everything is settled…“  
“Actually Captain,” interruptsed Lucretia “I have finished the records of the previous cycle already and was hoping to see more detail of this plane myself for cataloging. Since we are currently in what seems like a nature reserve I was planning to go take note of some of the local fauna and flora.“  
“Than you are coming with us little Miss, Flora is my specialty” Said Merle throwing an arm around Lucretia.  
“Yes I am aware” Lucretia said shrugging him off “You are the ships biologist.”  
“That sounds excellent Lucretia” said Davenport bringing his hands together “ I will stay here and work on the ship, be smart out there, if either of you find it return immediately, and if you don’t find it before sunrise come back and we’ll regroup”  
“Aye-aye Cap-i-tan” said Lup with a lazy salute. She spins and jumps out the StarBlaster doors and Taako follows.  
Magnus hooted and rushed out. Lucretia chuckled and follows him outside with her journal and quill in tow.  
“Hey wait up guys stubby legs!” Merle shouts out the door and he lifts himself out of his seat and awkwardly jogs after them.  
The twilight of this realm had just fallen, a soft orange hue falling over the planets blue vegetation, and the slightest light from stars beginning to peak out of the sky.  
“Wow” Lucrectia whispered softly.  
“Neato right?” Laughed Taako, “Alright! You losers head that way” he said flourishing his wand to the north, sending a light down a barely visible path through the woods. “Team Taako is headed this way”. He strolls off onto a much clearer path, Lup ruffling his hair as they start off.  
“Alright, then I suppose…” Lucretia starts, turning to her team to see them already jogging into the woods. She sighed with a soft laugh and followed.

Team Taako  
It did not take the twins long to get bored in the dark woods and start to goof off. Firing magic lights into the path and at eachother.  
“Now Lup, I know how tempting it is but no firepower dear, do remember last time” Taako jeered turning to face his sister and casually walking the path backwards without a glace.  
“Oh do NOT tempt me sweetie, only YOU can prevent forest fires.” Lup laughed though she did her best to not do anything too firey and showy, it only took one cycle with a blazing forest fire for her to learn that lesson.  
“If you can’t stand the heat stay out of the kit-“  
“HOLY FUCK” Lup shouted breaking into a fit of laughter at the sight in front of her”  
“What?” Taako asked, surprised and confused by the sudden reaction.  
“Look BEHIND you dingus” Lup retorted, grabbing his shoulders and spinning him to face the clearing they had just entered.  
“Ooooooh” said Taako, understanding in an instant, there wasn’t really any other way to react when one walks straight into an open air orgy.

 

Team Losers  
“This place is beautiful” Lucretia said, walking beside Merle as Magnus lead the pack, wildly and joyfully hacking at any vegetation vaguely in their path with his axe.  
“Suuuuper pretty!” Magnus shouted back, turning his head to grin back at the other two, “Hey you guys think there might be any neat animals on this one? Y’know something big and fluffy-“  
“Magnus the Captain has been pretty clear-“ Lucretia started, speaking more out of concern than disapproval  
“Yeah yeah no dog’s in space, but if they aren’t TECHNICALLY dogs….” Interrupted Magnus, his gin only widening with the half-joke, making Lucretia’s heart flutter slightly. She so rarely got out quite like this.  
“I don’t know about not-dogs, but there are some seriously sweet plants out here.” Said Merle, bag already half full of samples.  
“Oh? Anything familiar?” Asked Lucretia  
“Tons, basically everything here look related to stuff I’ve seen before” Said Merle, twirling a leave between his fingers from his most recent pick.  
“From your healing gardens? If we would stock up on medicinal herbs it would probably make your job a lot easier with this lug” Lucretia said motioning her head in Magnus’ direction, earning a chuckle from him.  
“Well not necessarily just my, healing gardens….”Merle said starting to laugh.  
“Than what makes them so special” Lucretia asked with budding curiosity.  
“Well almost all of these are drugs” Merle said, plainly with a smile.


	2. Heck of a Plane

Team Stayed With The Ship  
“How are those readings of the planar energy coming along Barry?” Davenport asked rolling out from underneath one of the maintenance hatches for the StarBlasters controls.  
“Oh they’re uh strange, but they shouldn’t cause us too much trouble” Barry says, eyes still fixated on a miniature of the system he had floating above the main table in the ships living space.  
“Can you be more specific?” Davenport asked, now walking over to the bemused scientist and wiping the grime off his hands.  
“Uh- yeah, yeah of course” Barry said shuffling his seat over to let Davenport hop onto a seat and get a better view. “So basically the barriers between planes here are weaker than average in this system”. The model shifted as Barry spoke, the planes pulling together and waves gently rolling off of them. “That causes some extra bond energy automatically, which is some of what I picked up.”  
“Some” asked Davenport brow furrowing  
“Well not all of it can be accounted for prom just proximity, but most likely the people living here crossing between planes more often is the cause for most of the rest, maybe some huge collective governance or religion powering more.” Barry explained. “More strong bonds basically. The only thing we need to watch for is slipping between planes”  
“Alright, I suppose careful piloting will be required.” Davenport said smirking ever so slightly  
“And we might want to watch out with magic use and meditation” Barry said  
“Meditation?”  
“Well any mind alteration on a system like this could in theory push or pull someone between planes but like I said before it won’t likely be a problem. You’d have to go pretty far… oh and dying here we might actually cross planes into the after life unlike other systems, but we’d still be stitched together fine in the next system…” Barry began to drift off looking out the window into the darkness of the unfamiliar night.  
Davenport smiled, softly and knowingly “Don’t worry about Lup Barry she can take care of herself.”  
Barry turned cherry red “What- why would I, worry about Lup s-specifically?” He choked “I- I mean All the crew is out there, Lup and Taako and Magnus and Lup I MEAN Lucretia and Merle”  
“Now Merle we might need to worry about” Davenport said, jokingly but with the slightest hint of concern “Too pretty a ficus and we might never get him back, but I am sure Lup is just fine.”

Team Taako  
“Damn I should have paired off with literally anyone but my baby brother so I could get INTO this” Lup exclaimed. The park in front of them writhing with bodies of every nearly every humanoid species the had encountered. The area was hazy with strange magical interference and light, and a not insignificant amount of smoke, and music seemed to be playing from the air itself. Lup laughed and haughtily spun away from the fuck fest to head back to the ship  
“Really? Woulda jumped right into bone town with Preacher Uncle Merle watching?” Taako asked with raised eyebrows.  
“Ok not Merle-“ Lup started  
“CapnPort?” Taako interjeced  
“Ugh no-“ Lup recoiled “and not Maggie either OBVIOUSLY, damn we are low on fuckable crew…”  
“BaaaAAArryy” Taako warbled wiggling his eyebrows and poking at his sisters ribs.  
Lup immediately got her brother into a headlock and noogied his goofy wizards hat off his head, but not before Taako could see her face flush half as bright as her robes.  
“Oooooow” Taako whined and pulled his head out, “Okay just for that YOU have to tell Lucretia about this for the records” He taunted straightening out his now crumpled hat.  
“Oh gods are you sure you wanna give that up the look on her face is gonna be CHOICE!” Lup laughs  
“Damn good point Lulu” Taako says “That was a little more wild than the campus IPRE parties huh?”  
“Uuuuh duh doy” Lup says “seriously though that was some majorly impressive shit going down. Usually only get that kinda collective magic from hardcore magic monks and shit”  
“So that weird light definetly wasn’t THE Light right? Don’t really wanna dig through that and risk steppin on anyones junk” Taako said  
“Nope, not our mission target my boy, but I’ll tell you this. Lup said swinging an arm over Taakos shoulders “Our new mission is getting to party with some of these folks”

Team Losers  
Lucretias face was in a rather choice state of confused surprise. “Drugs? L-like fanstasy asprin or-“  
“Nah like Shrooms” Merle says grabbing a mushroom nearly the size of his head from the ground, “they’re way bigger here than back home but definitely the same shit”  
“More to go around I guess huh?” Magnus chuckled gently elbowing at Lucretia.  
“Magnus!” Lucretia said blushing slightly but not stepping away “This is still a scientific expedition and-“  
“Awww Lucy you gotta lighten-“ Magnus began before Merle cut in.  
“FOUND THE LIGHT!” Merle exclaimed, pulling it out of a particularly tall plant “It was in this huge pile of weed!”  
Magnus hooted “Take that Taako!”  
Merle laughed and began adding leaves from the towering cannabis plant to his pack.  
Lucretia blinked hard, she was having a hard time believing the situation she was in, and for the first time was considering just leaving out things from her records of this plane, but she regained composure. “Great, we should head back then! Capn-Davenport and Barry will want to know we’ve retrieved the light”  
“And they’ll probably wanna know about how, DOPE this plane is right!” Magnus insisted looking Lucretia right in the eye and immediately getting a laugh out of Merle. “Huh? HUH?”  
Lucretia could not help but chuckle slightly “Yes. And that too I suppose”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for:  
> A) Weird formatting, still no real writing experience  
> B) Taking so long to post this, I literally wrote it in like an hour but I kept putting off writing anything for ages case again no experience  
> C) This being kinda slow in general. Hey I like writing characters chatting more than stuff happening apparently.


End file.
